In the mood

I woke up this morning in the mood to scrap this whole diet thing, eat everything in the house, gain back all my weight, sit on the couch, and revel in my chunkiness.
LOL.
I guess it started last night when I had crazy insane munchies. I gave in to the munchies and had a bunch of different foods. Not large portions, but many things. Oh well, right?
Well, I guess one bad turn deserves another and this morning I just wanted to give up.
I think it mostly stems from being stressed out. I've got so many things on my plate right now that I have no control over that food tends to be that outlet that I do have complete control over. So, when things feel out of control I want to look at food and say, "You can't control me. If I want to eat all of you, dag nab it, I'm going to do it. Who's going to stop me?" And well, no one would stop me.
Aren't we all such emotional eaters? Food is one thing that we can really manipulate and control.
A few random thoughts about this. As a Mom, have you ever noticed how when your kid is hurt or mad or frustrated or happy we tend to turn to food to solve the problem? Oh, you won? Let's eat. Oh, you lost? Let's eat. Did you hurt your knee? Have an ice cream cone and you'll feel all better. Bored? Grab a snack and think of what you can do.
Do you think as a fat society (as in wealthy) we perpetuate and even possibly create the connection between food and emotions?
My baby eats every two to three hours. My kids when they're little are the same way. They go through periods when they're growing where they eat a lot, and they go through periods when they eat like birds. They have no problem leaving the table with food left on their plate. They have no problem declaring, "I'm full."
Do we totally mess up our natural ability to eat wisely?
Do you think we'd go to food to comfort us, do you think we'd use food to gain a sense of control in our lives, if we weren't given food as children in conjunction to events and emotions?
I have a theory that we have created this problem. I think we've all been taught to use food to solve problems. But all food is empty calories and solves nothing.
So, when I get "in the mood" to destroy my diet, to give up on caring about my health and well being, I try to say to myself, "Why? What is the root cause of my discomfort? Am I eating out of boredom? Am I eating because of stress? Am I depressed? Am I frustrated?"
I think this morning I think I feel like giving up not on my diet, but on my life. And no no no I'm not talking suicide or anything. I'm talking about wanting to crawl back in bed, eat a tub of ice cream, pretend I have no children and no husband, and just waste away for a while.
So then, why do I feel that way? What's going on?
Well, this is actually a really easy thing to solve. I am so busy and my schedule is so crazy, and I keep forgetting things because I have so many new things being added to my life right now that I can't keep them together.
Here's my list of things I am responsible for. And no I won't do a full list, but you'll get the gist.
The house: cooking, cleaning, laundry, reorganizing, consolidating, vacuuming, disinfecting, etc etc etc
My baby: dressing, changing, feeding, walking, burping, napping, etc
Three other children
My husband
Food on a budget
Clothes
Two kids in karate
Teaching piano lessons to thirteen people plus my two kids
School
Preschool
Young Womens
Church
Scouts
Family Home Evening
Nightly Family scripture and prayer
Feeding aforementioned baby every two hours.

You try feeding a baby between all that other stuff. It's fun! No wonder I forget to pick up one kid from preschool. No wonder I forget that someone is picking up my kid from scouts even though I just talked to that person an hour before. No wonder I feel like pounding down a bag of popcorn, eating all my piano students reward chocolate, etc.
My husband made a comment that when he looks at my schedule it gives him a headache. Well, hubby, try living my schedule and see what that does for you.
No wonder.